Friday, December 17, 2010

Does this blog make my butt look big?

I'm sooooo excited! I just got an email from Daphne G. at a site called Daphne just had to tell me she was 'super impressed' by my blog's design and content. Oh, really, Daphne?

Tell me, tell me, tell me, cause I'm just dyyyying to know... what is it about the 'design' that superimpressed you? The boilerplate template, or the sheep? Ha, it's the sheep! (It's always the sheep.) And the content that you found so scintillating...I'll bet anything that it was my post that explored the topic of cesspools vs. septic tanks. That grabs readers like no body's business.

Let me back up and explain about

You see, in my world nothing makes less sense than getting a spam invitation to join a fashion review site like If, like me, you've never heard of Lookville, it's a site where people can post pix of an outfit or accessory they've put together or are considering and get reviews from readers, followers and random fashionistas. Subscribers either model the outfit themselves or post manufacturer's advertising photos.

I have two issues with getting hit with this...the first is that NOTHING could be more irrelevant for my world. Not one of the reviews touched on irrigation boots, Sorels, hats with ear flaps, really sturdy work gloves, or the fashion style my husband likes to refer to as 'Paonia-chic' which essentially means yoga pants under a frilly skirt, accessorized by homemade jewelry and knit hats. Cover the whole mess with an over-sized hand-knit woolly sweater, something handwoven, or if all else fails, a good barn coat, and you're good to go. That outfit will get you anywhere you want to go in the North Fork Valley. (Any of the bars, pizza places, the Paradise theatre or City Market)

You just don't see peep toe patent leather electric blue booties with five inch heels around here, and if you did, it would be kind of a freakshow, because it wouldn't be more than 3 minutes before the wearer of said booties would end up ass-over-teakettle in the gravel, or worse yet, in a snowbank. Plus, the elements would totally trash any really good shoes.

The second problem I've got with this is the site itself. It's really kind of a bitch-fest. Imagine gathering up all the people you know who obsess over all things superficial (as a reference, I'm going back to my brief career in cosmetics) and give them a vehicle for being nothing but judgmental. It's one thing to carefully select an's another to have new shoes be your sole (get it?) reason for living. Now factor in the element that Internet communications have the credibility of stuff written on a bathroom wall, (Yes, this blog is included) and you have a whole bunch of people making judgements about stuff that at the end of the day, does not have the power to change the world. (OMG we were going to declare war on that village but chose not to because of how cool they looked...that, and we did not want their substandard goats.)

Hey...if you want an opinion on statement bags, over-the-knee-boots, or floral platform pumps, try making up your own mind.

What I really find amazing is the level of insecurity out there.

Here's a new idea for fashion. Put it on. See how it feels. If you don't feel like you're going to fall over, or vomit, then go ahead and look in the mirror. If you're a city dweller or business person, can you dash for a cab? Move and bend in the middle? If you still don't feel nauseated, then ask yourself, do I like it? Do I like it? If so, go for it. Wear it in good health. Please yourself.

Why in the world do people care so much for the opinions of folks they don't even know, respect or worse yet; know are trying to sell them stuff? Why do we let the opinions of others define us? If you really need some feedback on that leopard print dress, ask someone you trust, who cares enough to be honest. Try asking someone whose style is real, wearable, and doesn't live in an airbrushed world of one-dimension.

Oh, and another thing...if you guys at Lookville were really on it, you wouldn't be spamming like a lottery scam from Nigeria.

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