Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Things that suck...

Today's list of things that suck...
Let's start the list with Rush Limbaugh. He's a slimy, snarky piece of trash- and anyone who is fool enough to let him into their home ought to pull their head out of their butt...all the way, not just part way out- because honestly, if you give credibility to this dickhead, you're pretty much an much asshole by association.
This is the same asshat who believed every whory thing that has been said about each and every Democrat, but is now defending Herman Cain against the growing sexual harrassment allegations. He spent a lot of energy mispronouncing Sharon Bialick's name last night, and succeeded only in making himself sound even creepier and pervier than usual. One of these days, his ass is going to get busted while he's trolling for illegal Viagra scrips....the rat bastard.

Something else that sucks? The 'Personhood' Amendment. We're watching Mississippi where some scary stuff is coming down. I wonder if voters there will decide that basic rights should be ripped away from 50% of the persons that already exist outside the womb. Initiative 26 is mind-boggling... denying women control of their own reproductive rights; going so far as to not only outlaw abortion, but restrict birth control and  invitro fertilization. I find it unreal that ANYONE would let the Mississippi Legislature in their uterus. And another thing- if you've got a penis, why should you have a say? It's simple. You don't have the equipment, you don't get a say in what goes on with the equipment. Here in Colorado, we had a similar ballot initiative last year. It was defeated by a healthy margin, but hell...we're not Mississippi. I wonder if they'll demonstrate why not all of us jump on the States' rights bandwagon.

Bible-thumpers who insist on hitting their kids suck, and since violence is the only thing that these assholes comprehend, they ought to get their dicks shut in the car door whenever they open their mouths to preach this crap. These fuckers surface every once in a while and go on about how they're directed by God to punish their children. They seem to obsess about punishment. Don't their kids ever behave? These guys also always like to go on and on about "How they got beat when they were kids and they're just fine!" Hey, guess what..."You're not." People emerge as healthy humans in spite of physical violence, not because of it, and anyone who believes otherwise is misinformed. Or just stupid. It is possible to raise healthy children without hitting them-if people have to resort to hitting it means they lack resources, or they are simply not as smart as the children they are in charge of. Or indulging their own tempers. Using the bible as justification is garbage- but it does give insight into why the kids who go nuts and kill their parents almost exclusively come from religious backgrounds.

Rance Dazzle or whatever the name of that little pipsqueek who heads the Republican National Committee sucks. OK, his name isn't Rance Dazzle, it's Reince Priebus, and I just got done listening to him answer (try and answer) on what a train wreck the Republican candidates have been. He snaked around the fact that in spite of the economy and criticism from both the right and left, if the election was held now, President Obama would beat ALL of the Repo's. Just sit there in your nastiness, Rance, or Reince or whoever you are, until you realize that we have a waaayyyy lower opinion of  the tea partiers in Congress than we do of the WH. Anyway, you are totally irrelevant.

Non-political sucking items:

Cats that weigh too much, climb up on the table and eat pasta off your lunch plate suck. This cat ignores more diet rules than I do.( the fat bastard weighs 32 lbs! Healthy cat food? Right.)  He refuses to stay off the dining room table, so I finally compromised and stuck a cardboard box there- he climbs in and mostly stays out of my way, except when he doesn't. Today, when I was distracted by the phone, he got out and finished my lunch. I was only away from the table for 3 minutes, but Jeez- who wants to eat pasta after it has cat spit on it? Good thing I'm not one of those creepy fundies- I know how they deal with disobedience. Not going to smack the cat. Will reason with him...he's obviously smarter than the average Republican. Just for the record, he takes up the same space as 4 six packs of beer; in case you were wondering, and I think I threw out my back the last time I had to do cat removal.

Going down to the basement sucks. The only reason I ever go to the basement is because that's where the washer and dryer are...and now, I put that off until I'm totally out of clean underwear. Otherwise I'd never, ever go down those stairs. It's frightening down there. I live in mortal fear of mouses.(I know, I know, the plural of mouse is mice, but in my mind, referring to them as mouses makes them sound not so vermin-y. Vermin-y? Too much?) I've never seen a mouse in the basement, but I know that if ever there were a mouse in the house it would hang out in the basement. Plus, it's always dark, and that's where the serial killers stay, or would if they ever came to the house. What I have seen in the basement is a couple of scorpion bodies, a few live lizards, a toad, and about 4,722 assorted bugs, both the live and dead variety. I may give up wearing panties altogether, because then I could put off laundry for even greater stretches, but that's a topic for another day.


  1. Do not.

    Repeat. Do Not!

    Go down in the basement.

    Buy or trade for more underwear.

    Love your blog!


  2. Suzan...so glad to know SOMEONE understands the basement thing!thanks for that...